


Pretentious Coffee and Textbooks

by phoenixpalmer



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Fluff, M/M, Pre-Relationship, carlos is a student, cecil is a radio presenter, kind of
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-17
Updated: 2014-07-04
Packaged: 2018-02-05 02:40:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1802338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phoenixpalmer/pseuds/phoenixpalmer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Carlos is a student who has just landed himself a job at the local coffee shop, Cecil is a young presenter who hosts the lunch time show at the local radio station. A ridiculously long coffee order is placed and it is love at first sight, for one of them anyway.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first proper contribution to the Night Vale fandom, so I'm really excited to post this! Basically this is kind of a coffee shop AU that is loosely based on the main events in the podcast concerning Cecil and Carlos - I hope you guys like it! It would be really lovely if you dropped me a comment letting me know what you think :) also, thank you to the lovely Eleanor for beta reading!

"Okay, so you just press that button and..." Carlos trailed off, before pressing said button and engulfing his vision with steam – fogging his glasses.

  
"Yep, that's the ticket!" Manager John Peters said, placing his hands on his hips and backing away. "I think you'll be alright with the basics today, we don't get that many awkward customers wantin' big orders, but just shout if you need help!" He finished, walking away into the backroom and leaving Carlos to his first day working as a barista.

  
This was only a part time job however, just something to pay for the food. And the books. And the rent. And just about everything else that needs money to happen.

 

But every time he was reminded of the harshness of reality and the overly processed taste of 5 minute meals, he set his mind on what it would all eventually be for: being a scientist.

  
Carlos Ramerez had set out for university around 2 months ago, and upon arriving had realised just how small the grant for your average science student was. Over the months he had been attending, he had found himself a decent apartment with a lovely elderly lady who went by the name of Josie as a landlady, a good group of friends who were all doing various science degrees and just recently landed himself a part-time job in the coffee shop just near the town centre. Life was looking pretty good!

  
~

  
The morning's first customer came in and asked for a hot chocolate, simple enough.Carlos made the woman's drink fairly easily, accepted her payment then took the order of the next customer. Throughout the morning, your average coffee drinkers entered the bittersweet smelling café to get their fix. Business men in sharp suits, early-bird students who attended the local high school and even some of Carlos' classmates that he recognised and greeted with a more genuine smile than he had the others.

 

At around 11 o'clock, a rather dapperly attractive looking man with tattoos spiraling up the exposed skin of his arms and creeping round the bottom of his neck which was visible over the collar of his lavender shirt waltzed through the door and, without looking up from his phone, said, “The usual please, John.”

 

Carlos stared for a second, not really having come across a situation like this in his 3 hours of working at the quirky coffee shop on the corner. He spoke up, “Uh, John isn't here at the moment, but if you tell me your order I could try to make it for you?”

 

The man in the lavender shirt looked up and placed his phone in his pocket, “Oh? Oh! I'm sorry, I-I didn't realise you...” he trailed off, staring into Carlos' eyes as if all the secrets of the universe were deeply embedded in them. His cheeks went a tiny bit pinker and his mouth gaped slightly.

 

Carlos broke eye contact and glanced around the room, growing more and more uncomfortable under the man's gaze. Finally, he continued, “I didn't realise you weren't John. So, I'd like a large cinnamon latte with one and a half shots of espresso made with semi-skimmed soy milk and topped with half-fat whipped cream and a sprinkling of cashew nuts in a to-go cup. Please!”

 

“I, well uh, who's it for?” Carlos asked, knowing that writing a name on a cup was probably the only thing he could actually manage from that ridiculous order.

 

“It's for Cecil,” he replied, his small smile highlighting the dark circles under his eyes. He definitely not look like a morning person.

 

After writing the man's name on the empty cup, Carlos began looking around, judging whether or not he should at least make an attempt at whipping up the most pretentious coffee order he had ever heard, or just getting John from the back and asking him to make it.

 

Deciding that he wanted to make a good impression on his first day at work, he set off tackling the mammoth order. He counted it a small blessing that there was no one in the queue behind the tattooed man because this meant less pressure and, scientifically speaking, less chance of him messing the order up. He hoped.

 

“Okay so, latte first,” he mumbled to himself while he poured the milk into the cup to be steamed and looked around for the cinnamon flavouring that he was sure was only used by John to make Cecil's morning coffee. “There you are...”Carlos pulled the flavouring from the left hand side of the cupboard and scooped 2 big spoonfuls into the special mixing cup.

 

“Are you new here?” Cecil asked, leaning over the counter and surveying the man slowly finding his way round the order.

 

“Yeah, well kind of, I moved here a few months ago,”

 

“Oh? Why did you move?”

 

“I'm studying at the local university,” Carlos replied, heading towards the right-hand side of the room to look in the 'toppings' section of the shelves for some cashew nuts.

 

“Ah, what are you studying?”

 

Was it normal here for someone to ask so many questions about the guy that was making them coffee?

 

“Um, astrophysics and some classes on anomalous phenomena,” Carlos said as he was swirling the whipped cream over the top of the admittedly delicious smelling coffee. He grabbed a handful of ground up cashews and sprinkled them over the top, slotted the cup into the sleeve that prevented customers from burning their hands and placed it on the counter in front of Cecil – who perked up immensely once the strong aroma reached his nose.

 

“Uh, that'll be 6.50 please,” Carlos said after punching in the numbers and printing out a receipt.

 

“Here's 10, consider the rest a tip,” Cecil said with a quick wink. He took a sip, sighed dreamily and spoke again, “Thank you for the coffee, it was lovely meeting you-” his eyebrows furrowed slightly as he read the name badge pinned on the breast pocket of the uniform, “Carlos.”

 

And with that, the man headed out of the door and down the street.

 

~

 

John walked out of the back room about ten minutes later to check on his new employee. “How're things goin'?” he asked, the corners of his eyes wrinkling as he smiled.

 

“They're going good I think, there was one guy that came in before who had a really strange order though,” Carlos said, looking towards the door as if Cecil would burst in at the mere mention of his name.

 

John laughed, “That'd be Cecil! He's been comin' here pretty much every mornin' for years now, you managed to do his order then?” He asked, the tone of surprise that hung from the question was prominent.

 

“Yes, it sounded really complicated at first but I guess I got it right?” Carlos said, cringing slightly under his manager's questioning gaze.

 

“And he was happy with it?!” John laughed louder than before and clapped Carlos on the shoulder, “Boy, you can stay! That Cecil is so picky 'bout his coffee... Oh and speakin' of him,” John reached up and took a radio off the shelf nearest Carlos' head and fiddled around with it, “his show should be on soon!”

 

Carlos wanted to ask what show, but the other man had disappeared off into the back room again. He picked up the radio and turned up the volume, and sure enough he heard Cecil's low, smooth voice emitting from device.

 

“ _A friendly desert community where the sun is hot, the moon is beautiful and mysterious lights pass overhead while we all pretend to sleep...”_

 

Carlos heard a small cough from behind the counter and looked up to see a young girl waiting for him to take her coffee. He placed the radio down behind the till and apologised to the girl for making her wait. She told him not to worry about it and gave him her order. It was nothing too strenuous, just a mocha and a chocolate cookie.

 

While he was serving her, half of his attention was focused on hearing the strange man on the radio's show. Being a trainee scientist, you learn to multi-task whatever gender you are. He finished up the order and a fair few more after that until what seemed to be the lunch 'rush' in this café was over.

 

As he was cleaning up some spilt sugar off the side, he could tune in more to the radio show that had been going in the background.

 

“ _...she will be out near the car lot. A new man made me my morning coffee today, with his perfect and beautiful haircut and perfect and beautiful uniform. He says he is studying science at our local university.”_

 

Wait.

 

Carlos froze. No, he definitely cannot be talking about him. There was no way a man who he had spoken to exactly once in his whole life was talking about him and using such... adjectives to describe him.

 

“ _Well, we've all been students at one point or another in our lives. But why now? Why here? This new scientist, I now know is named Carlos, has a square jaw and teeth like a military cemetery.”_

 

“Oh my God...” Carlos mumbled. He wasn't hearing things, the man on the radio was actually talking about him!

 

“ _His hair is perfect. And I'm sure we all hate, despair and love that perfect hair in equal measure. Everything about him was just... perfect. And I fell in love instantly.”_

 

What is going on?! Not only had he been mentioned by someone he barely knew on an actual radio show that actual people listened to, but said person was describing his features as 'beautiful' and 'perfect' and even declared his love for him! All on his first day at work!

 

“Oh Carlos, it's lookin' like someone's got a little crush!” John shouted from the back room, laughing away to himself and listening to the radio show.

 

By this time, Carlos was blushing wildly and absentmindedly playing with his hair whilst wishing that the ground would swallow him up right then and there. Even if that was almost 100% impossible.

 

~

 

His first shift passed without so much as a spilt coffee, barring the part where the radio presenter announced his love for the dark, delicate skinned man, and he was pretty proud of himself. On the drive home, he thought about how thankful for the opportunity to make some decent money under a fair employer in a nice work environment he was.

 

Once he got back to his apartment, he read his copy of The Day We Found the Universe by Marcia Bartusink for a few hours and did some homework. According to his schedule, the sun should have set by the time he had finished off the essay he was writing, but tonight that wasn't the case. Chalking it up to a small mistake on his part, he headed off to bed – the day's events still swimming around in his head.


	2. Chapter 2

“ _Have a good day listeners, have a good day!”_

 

Cecil nodded to the man sitting behind the glass just outside his recording booth to end the show. When he was given the thumbs up, he took his heavy headphones off and placed them gently on his desk. He rubbed his face with both hands and then reached into his pocket, grabbing his phone.

 

Upon clicking the unlock button, he was greeted with his wallpaper (a picture of a wood carving he had crafted in the shape of his cat) and the small notification that stated that he had received a text message.

 

It was from his long-term friend Dana and it said: _So, who's this lovely Carlos?!_

 

Cecil smiled and replied: _I'll tell you over coffee, meet me in the lobby?_

 

He had met Dana when he was but a lowly intern at the radio station and she was studying the 'behind the scenes' of radio and media. Now, one and a half years later, they were the best of friends and had both ended up doing what they love.

 

The twenty five year old man stood up and exited the recording studio, waving a quick 'goodbye' to station manager Jeremy on his way out. He walked with a spring in his step as he was bordering on ridiculously excited to tell Dana all about Carlos the lovely, radiant scientist who made him the best cinnamon latte with one and a half shots of espresso, semi-skimmed soy milk and topped with half-fat whipped cream with a sprinkling of cashew nuts in a to-go cup that he has ever tasted! It's not fair for someone to be _that_ attractive _and_ good at making coffee!

 

Cecil took a seat on one of the light yellow, plush chairs in the bustling lobby of the radio station and waited for Dana to finish.

 

~

 

“Cecil, hi!” Dana said as she spotted him sat down within the small crowd of people that were wandering around the station lobby. Upon hearing her call, Cecil got up and enveloped his friend in a hug. “It's so nice to see you! We haven't had a good talk in a while, but first...” she trailed off, a knowing look in her eyes and a sly grin.

 

“Dana, it's so good to see you! And yes, Carlos,” Cecil said the last part of the sentence with an almost longing tone and from that moment, Dana realised just how smitten her friend was with this scientist turned coffee boy. “Oh, Dana, he's perfect!” he all but shouted, grabbing her hands and jumping in the air slightly.

 

“Yes, I heard – and so did the rest of the city,” Dana said, squeezing Cecil's hands back and smiling.

 

“Well I couldn't _not_ tell my listeners could I?!”

 

She laughed and turned around towards the sliding glass doors. “Come on, let's go and see if he's still working!”

 

Cecil almost skipped out of the doors and down the street to the quirky coffee shop on the corner. But he stopped dead right outside the door to the café, causing an elderly couple to bump into him. He apologised then turned to Dana.

 

“Cecil? Why aren't you going in?” she asked, craning her neck in an attempt to peck through the small, glass window in the old oak door.

 

“What if he thinks I'm... weird for talking about him on the radio? What if, oh God, what if he avoids me?!” Cecil exclaimed, eyes widening and putting a hand over his mouth.

 

“Well there's nothing you can do about it now, so why worry? Just go in there and see what his reaction is!”

 

“Okay, I'll go in,”

 

Cecil took a deep breath and opened the door of the gorgeous smelling café. His eyes darted straight to the front counter and he saw, “John?”

 

“Hey Cecil, you wantin' the usual? And what will it be for your ladyfriend?” John asked from behind the front counter, the radio was quietly playing some soft folk music behind him and the place held it's usual smell of coffee and spices. There were only around six other people in the small cafe, it was exactly how Cecil liked it. But, since this morning, it didn't feel complete enough. It felt like there was something, or more specifically someone, missing from one of the few places in the world where he felt completely at ease.

 

“Yes, please,” Cecil said, sounding slightly defeated.

 

“I'll have a cup of Earl Grey tea, please!” Dana said with a smile.

 

“Gotcha, I'll bring 'em over when they're ready!” John said with a smile, turning his back to prepare the drinks.

 

They both picked their usual corner table for two nearest the window and sat down in their respective places.

 

After a few minutes of silence, Cecil spoke, “Oh, I so wanted to show him to you!”

 

Dana smiled sympathetically at her friend and “I'm sure I'll see him soon!” He never ceased to amaze her. The way he was so passionate about so many things. Cecil often reminded her of a lightning storm with no rain, achromatic and placid most of the time, but a single spark could make his eyes illuminate and his words become immediately more zealous.

 

Admittedly, there was the odd time that she was envious of his huge capacity to feel. It wasn't a rare occasion when Cecil's eyes lit up with an emotion, but it had been a long time since she had seen them ignite with so much passion.

 

John brought the drinks over and placed them carefully on the table, Dana and Cecil both paid and added a small tip before he left them to their corner seat. She brought the warm mug up to her nose and inhaled the comforting scent, releasing a soft sigh as she exhaled. “So, what's been going on apart from Carlos the perfect Scientist?”

 

~

 

It was around 8:30am when Carlos woke up the next morning, he shifted onto his back and stretched; clicking his back and yawning. Rubbing his eyes with one hand, he grabbed his glasses from the side table and put them on clumsily. It was Wednesday which meant no work and afternoon classes so he could take his time getting ready.

 

He toyed with the idea of just rolling over and going back to sleep, but hunger got the better of him. Yawning once again, he sat up and stretched then eventually stood up and made his way to the ridiculously small kitchen that was in his apartment.

 

After having made a reasonably nutritious breakfast of honey on toast with a cup of black coffee, he seated himself on a small chair in front of the big, double doors that led to a tiny balcony on the side of the building. This was the favourite part of Carlos' day, sitting with his coffee and toast in front of the city – watching the world wake up.

 

It was times like this when he found himself having his routine existential crisis. It dawned on him every morning, much like the constant dawning of the sun, that every single one of those small dots down below was a human being. Just like himself but so, so beautifully different.

 

His mind followed its own train of thought for a good while until he somehow ended up at Cecil. That strange, but definitely attractive, man from yesterday. What made him take such a liking to Carlos? Was it the way his coffee was made? And, why on earth did he feel the need to announce it to the world?! Carlos was mortified, but then again kind of flattered...

 

He wondered if he would get to talk to him again. Not that he had a desperate need to of course, he was just curious as to what results it would yield. A good scientist was never without a hypothesis. In this case, it was that a situation would arise where he would get the chance to talk with Cecil again and he would avoid confrontation as much as humanly possible and probably somehow border onto non-human ways of avoiding it.

 

No one had taken such an interest in him in a long while, it baffled him how much Cecil actually listened to what he was saying and, evidentially, had taken every syllable in. The last person that cared that much that wasn't family and more than a friend was... Oh God no. It was way too early for him to be remembering such past events.

 

He was torn from his thoughts by his text tone coming faintly from his bedroom. It was his friend Rochelle, the routine text asking: _Hey Carlos, what time are you getting to class this afternoon?_

 

He texted back: _About 1, see you there!_

 

_~_

 

At around 1:05pm, Carlos had parked his car and met Rochelle at the main doors of the university and headed off to class with her.

 

The majority of the work that afternoon consisted of general physics knowledge and revision – mainly preparing everyone for the big paper they were going to have to write as part of their main course for the year.

 

After two hours of working, the professor called it a day and dismissed his tired, but now well prepared students. They all decided to meet up in the cafeteria downstairs to give and receive help if needed and to work extra time on their assignments. That lasted a good four minutes until someone brought the logistics of the Doppler Effect up and the paper was forgotten.

 

“I'm about 500% sure it was first observed in 1842, not 1942!” Rochelle exclaimed with a laugh.

 

“But then... oh. Oh, yeah. I knew that – I was just testing you!” Dave replied, earning another chorus of laughter from within the group. “And everyone knows it was George Doppler who discovered it,”

 

“No, no it was not!” Another girl piped up. “I don't think...”

 

Rochelle spoke up again, “Stop teasing, I know you know that it was Christian Doppler – quit acting stupid!”

 

“What makes you think I'm acting?” Dave said with a sly expression. “Hey, Carlos, why don't you tell us who first observed it!”

 

Carlos jumped slightly at the sound of his name tearing him from his thoughts, “Hm, what? Oh I'm sorry, are we still talking about the dapper effect?” he asked, quickly raising his head up from his left palm and looking up at his classmates.

 

“The dapper effect?” Dave asked, cocking his head slightly.

 

“What?” Carlos asked, a puzzled expression appearing on his face in tandem with a small blush.

 

Dave laughed as he noticed Carlos starting to blush, “You said the 'dapper' effect, your thoughts seem to be elsewhere today Carlos!” He said with a wink, playfully elbowing the blushing scientist sat next to him.

 

“Anyway,” Rochelle began after noticing her friend's obvious discomfort, “is anyone free for that seminar by that British astrologist tomorrow?”

 

Extremely glad for the change of subject, Carlos took a few seconds to compose himself while everyone was answering and giving their various excuses. He definitely was not thinking about the very dapper, no, _handsome_ radio producer who spoke of him so highly that day. No way.

 

When he looked up it seemed to be his turn to answer; after a quick glance at his phone's calendar he announced to the group he couldn't make it as he was scheduled in for a hairdressing appointment at the same time.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to the lovely people who commented and left kudos on the last chapter - I'm sorry this took so long! Also thank you to Eleanor for beta reading, again!

**Author's Note:**

> psst, if you want to chat about pretty much anything Night Vale, my tumblr is cecil--gershwin.tumblr.com


End file.
